Friday, November 29, 2013

Sleeping Over

While slightly off topic for this blog, I wanted to address an issue that sometimes causes concern and insecurity for young men. Since many of my readers are young men seeking guidance and reassurance on what to wear or not to wear in various situations, I expect a number of them will find this topic relevant. What should one wear when sleeping over at a friend's house? What about when having a friend sleep over at your house? Different households have different rules and habits and feeling these things out can occasionally be a bit awkward. You don't want to feel inappropriately dressed or make anyone else feel awkward.

How to treat these situations depends on the specific circumstances. If there is an extra room you will have to yourself, dress however you like for bed as it should be assumed you will be afforded some degree of privacy by this arrangement. If you will be sharing a room with a friend, you may be tempted to automatically dress more modestly than you ordinarily would, but that may actually make your friend more uncomfortable if they normally wear less. If you dress in pajamas, but your friend (host or guest) normally sleeps in boxers and has no pajamas, it may make him feel quite awkward.

Don't assume that just because your friend wears pajamas, or a t-shirt with his boxers, that your wearing boxers or foregoing a shirt will make him uncomfortable. Some people just have different preferences, it doesn't mean that we will find someone else's choice inappropriate. He may even decide he prefers what you wear, once presented with the option. When in doubt, ask. If your friend dons pajamas for bed, tell him what you normally wear and ask if it would make him or his family uncomfortable.

As a guest, you should mostly follow your host's lead on what to wear to the breakfast table, sitting up to watch a movie, or out in the yard. Some families that find it perfectly acceptable to go shirtless to bed or in the yard, have rules about proper dress for the table, etc. If you are the host, don't be afraid to go shirtless anytime you normally would, it's your house and your guest is more likely to feel set at ease than to be disturbed in any way.

Most of us feel more comfortable knowing what is "normal". For the record, most guys sleep in their underwear, usually boxers or boxer briefs, sometimes with a t-shirt. Very few guys sleep in their street clothes. If both of you are going to bed in street clothes, it is much more likely that both of you prefer to sleep in boxers, etc, and are simply too awkward or embarrassed to undress in front of the other without some indication they will not find it odd. Usually, if you take the lead, your friend will follow. If you aren't comfortable taking the lead, say something. Mention what you normally wear, or that sleeping in clothes is uncomfortable.






It is less common for guys to sleep naked (although certainly not abnormal, it's actually more common than street clothes), and it is more common for guys who would sleep naked at home alone to put on clothes when others are around. If you normally sleep naked, I would suggest at least wearing boxers or something to bed. That said, if you sleep over with a friend and both of you sleep naked and it doesn't bother either of you, that's no big deal, there's nothing wrong with it.

Finally, a note for parents when your kids have a friend sleeping over: There is no reason to expect them to dress more modestly than they would at home. It's perfectly normal for boys to sleep in their boxers or underwear. Unless your guest's parents have indicated otherwise, there should be no reason to enforce a stricter dress code than you normally have in your home. Even if the boys sleep naked, there is no cause for concern, it's no different than what they commonly encounter in a locker room.

Hopefully this will make a lot of people more comfortable and set some minds at ease. Feel free to share your opinions and experiences in the comments.

17 comments:

  1. Almost every night I sleep shirtless , I just cover myself with a blanket so that no one would know. I sleep with my cousin and he doesnt sleep shirtless even if its hot . He take it off for a few min and he wear it again. I love being shirtless and I like ur blog keep posting.:)

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  2. I like going shirtless also it feels great sleeping shirtless it what I do most

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  3. grew up sleeping in underwear or nude so still do that today, love the freedom of wearing little. great blog!!

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  4. grew up sleeping in underwear or nude so still do that today, love the freedom of wearing little. great blog!!

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    1. I grew up wearing nothing to bed since I was twelve. I enjoy the freedom of being able to get an erection without being bound up in underwear.

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  5. honestly, im fine with people being shirtless, im always shirtless, i like being shirtless, i mean i have clearly visible abs, muscles, pecs, im 18, i used to do it since i was a child because my shirt was too loose, it went under my back and started choking me, and also i sleep in boxers, and i dont even put a blanket on myself, even if i do, its a bit lower than my belly button, sometimes i just sleep nude but i still cover myself with a blanket only until the lower end of my body as i said, i also roam around my house in my boxers, no one says anything, my family doesnt get bothered, and also even my friends are fine with me being shirtless, even they are like that too, sooo yeah im fine with people being shirtless

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  6. I'm trying my best to get my best friend to enjoy the bare chested lifestyle this time of year. I leave my shirt off nearly 24 hours a day when I am not at work. It gets up to 112 degrees here in Arizona, so it is just more comfortable. I am not sure how to do it, but my friend is embarrassed to go shirtless but he would be much comfortable this way,

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  7. You have to be careful though. Sleeping naked is how my friend and I discovered frotting. I'm not saying every kid is like that, but boys are curious and naked wrestling before bed can either just be nude wrestling or quickly lead to accidental intimacy discovery.

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  8. I can't stand to sleep (or even fall asleep) in a shirt. Im always shirtless in bed, with or without something below.

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  9. I love to sleep in just my underwear. I sleep on my side so balls can get awkward when naked. I never get to because I share a room with my brother and he hates it when I don't wear a shirt or pants.

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  10. Look for men boxers and swimwear from originator brands and all with FREE and Fast Shipping at LADSRACK UNDERWEAR STORE. we give well done with great quality.

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  11. Yes you should. I always go to bed shirtless, only because I prefer to keep my shirt off 24 hours a day when at home

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  12. MY NAME IS MICHAEL SHOULD I SHAVE MY BODY HAIR OFF

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  13. Up to you, I myself don't like seeing men as hairy as a gorilla, but whether you shave it off is entirely up to you, but don't let that stop you from being shirtless

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